found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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