Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
