I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
