Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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