Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
