Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
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Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
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Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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