i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day