Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
