I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
