they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet