the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
It's official drugs can't kill me
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
