Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize