love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
