Texts From Last Night

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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  mornings like this make me wish i was morman.

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  (978): mornings like this make me wish i was morman. http://tfl.nu/eeuj
  Replies (32) Good night (1159) Bad night (2169)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?

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  (703): okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar. (1-703): I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up? http://tfl.nu/a4zj
  Replies (55) Good night (11999) Bad night (1097)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!

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  (540): The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!! http://tfl.nu/g9me
  Replies (21) Good night (4268) Bad night (1411)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long

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  (717): dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long http://tfl.nu/r5ag
  Replies (31) Good night (7236) Bad night (873)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.

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  (905): MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it. http://tfl.nu/mzwz
  Replies (40) Good night (5402) Bad night (1499)
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  (310): View more from California

  LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.

  (310): View more from California

  And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.

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  (310): LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers. (310): And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow. http://tfl.nu/mkft
  Replies (26) Good night (4184) Bad night (1254)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)

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  (912): Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :) http://tfl.nu/vv81
  Replies (8) Good night (1670) Bad night (715)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.

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  (512): I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25. http://tfl.nu/95s1
  Replies (7) Good night (862) Bad night (1572)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".

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  (386): Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant". http://tfl.nu/zn3b
  Replies (20) Good night (2385) Bad night (2030)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.

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  (210): Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it. http://tfl.nu/xm4g
  Replies (4) Good night (1624) Bad night (659)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?

  (309): View more from Illinois

  No idea. And yes be here at 4

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  (801): Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding? (309): No idea. And yes be here at 4 http://tfl.nu/o72l
  Replies (10) Good night (2139) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.

  (1-408): View more from California

  eating on the run again ?

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  (408): look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags. (1-408): eating on the run again ? http://tfl.nu/uddy
  Replies (1) Good night (816) Bad night (346)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.

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  (781): MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE. http://tfl.nu/t2xt
  Replies (4) Good night (545) Bad night (306)
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  (626): View more from California

  My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,

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  (626): My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing, http://tfl.nu/i8yq
  Replies (1) Good night (507) Bad night (237)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes

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  (563): I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes http://tfl.nu/k4tx
  Replies (2) Good night (523) Bad night (202)

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