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• (916): View more from California

  put your butt on the phone this is a booty call

  Fav 25 3353 1010

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.

  Fav 8 3050 2018

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• (805): View more from California

  Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.

  Fav 6 1027 1934

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (408): View more from California

  Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission

  Fav 6 2263 871

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  you seemed to enjoy falling down hill

  (540): View more from Virginia

  wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things

  (1-443): View more from Maryland

  Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!

  Fav 4 782 442

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• (360): View more from Washington

  I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.

  Fav 11 1122 596

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.

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