Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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