Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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