I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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