how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
