Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
