I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
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