I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
