O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
