i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
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and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
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I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.