butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize