oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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