David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
