I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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