I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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