I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
