New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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