grandma shit on top of the toilet
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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