It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize