Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
nutella sex= disaster
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
