I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
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We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize