that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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