Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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