you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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