You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
