Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
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When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
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I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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