who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
My bed smells like the plague
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
