She is in my trunk
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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