You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
