we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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