You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
