He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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