the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
you had me at cake vodka
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
