I am in a vortex of obligation.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
