youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
