Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
