the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Your topless pictures make me question reality
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize