I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
